1st day at work

Today was a big day.  We took the twins to a woman from my church who has an in-home daycare and will be watching them while I return to teaching. Today I had to start meetings to get ready for school next week so it was the first official day care day. It was really hard.  Not in the ways I expected though.  I felt pretty comfortable dropping them off this morning and then my husband accidentally locked the car with my purse still in it (and keys) and hopped on the bus to work. So I was stuck at the sitter's house for an extra hour waiting for him to come back and open the door.  When It was actually time for me to leave I felt ok and and was just thinking about work.  As the day wore on I worried about everything they could be doing. I was supposed to get them at 1 PM, but meeting ran late so I got there at 1:30PM. Gracie was being fed and was crying and Tate was sitting in a swing. I immediately worried bc they were supposed to eat at noon per our schedule, so I don't know if that means they were eating way late or early or what. Plus i feel bad for poor Tater swinging in the dark while the older toddlers she watches were napping on the floor next to him.  Next she told me that they had only eaten like 3 ounces and piece and I worry because they usually eat 5 or 6!  Is this going to be a hard transition for them, having someone else feeding them?  The sitter also looked tired which made me feel bad-are the twins too much to handle with other kids around? I know she has help, but will this work out?  The worst was hugging them and they didn't smell like my babies. They didn't stink or anything, they just smelled like someone else's home and that left me feeling unsettled. 

I took them right home and tried to feed them, they each at 6 ounces-so were they starving?! We played, applied baby lotion to get their sweet smell back and now they are napping. For the rest of the week I will be picking them up early, but next week school starts and I won't get them until about 4PM!  How much will I have missed? Will they have cried for me and not understood why I am gone? Will they feel scared or lonely?  I am so glad at least they have each other! I've heard the first day is the hardest so I am praying it gets easier for all of us. I never thought I had the temperament to be a stay at home mom, but I caught a glimpse today of how badly I will miss them. 

"Hey, I know You!"

The twins finally are seeing each other! This is so exciting in our little world!  We have been sitting them up face to face every so often to see what they will do, and usually they avoid eye contact at all costs, but while in California they started STARING and then smiling!  So much fun to watch, I think I could for hours (though they top out at about 15 minutes). It is just amazing to me, one will smile and they other will, one will cry and the other laughs.  They also started cooing at each other last night. This was particularly amazing for Tate since he normally doesn't coo much to Sean and I.  He was sticking his tongue out at Gracie and she was grabbing his feet and then they'd make eye contact and just stare. *sigh* So great. I can't believe I have to start work so soon, I don't want to miss any of this!

A Week in Review

We made it to Cali and back!  All in all it was a great trip.   We saw (and the babies met) so many family members on both sides and everyone loved them. The babies were fussier than I would have liked during the week, but really they did well considering how we uprooted their world . The plane rides went well and there was just fussing on take off and landing from Gracie-Tate was all smiles and sleepy. I was happy to let everyone hold the babies, but I think we made a mistake in letting too many people feed them.  Tate started eating a lot less and spitting up a ton, like he used to. By the end of the week I was happy to come home and have them all to myself again.   Some highlights were going to Downtown Disney a few times, the Pier at Huntington Beach,  babies first dip in the pool and Sean and I celebrated our 4th wedding anniversary!  The whole family babysat while we went out to a nice dinner and relaxed, it was great. I think we are all happy to be home, returning to our routine though. One more week until I go back to work! I am getting more and more nervous, luckily the nesties are giving me some good advice and schedules and whatnot. 

Tooting my own horn

Tomorrow is the big day!  People keep asking me if I am excited to go to CA on vacation and I always look shocked, like what vacation? Whose going on vacation? I'm taking my twins on a long trip during which I will probably work harder than at home.  Oh well, I am very excited to see family so that is a plus.  I am happy we are going, it just is going to take a lot of work and organization. We have 2 large suitcases in the living room now and I have been trying to add to them all day.  This is what we are planning to pack for the twins: 

1 pack n' Play

1 Bouncer chair

1 activity mat (Great -grandparents house has zero baby stuff)

2 swaddles

2 baby Bjorn's

1 stroller

2 car seats

7 bottles

10 bibs

18 onesies/outfits

2 swimsuits :)

1 pack of diapers and wipes

1 can of formula (we will buy more when we get there)

6 pacifiers

10 burp cloths

---and some other odds and ends. 

This doesn't even touch all the clothes and things my husband and I need for ourselves. But when it's all said and done we will be so glad they got to meet their great- grandparents and we had our first ever family vacation. It is always special for us to visit that area since we started going almost once a year since we were dating in high school, got engaged there (Disneyland), went for our 1 year anniversary, etc. So it's only fitting for our 4 year anniversary (we will celebrate while there) that we have our twins with us this time. 

We get back on Friday and then I will turn around and go to the Gorge to see Tom Petty in concert with my mom, sisters and some friends for her 50th birthday.  Then it will be time to start getting things organized in my new classroom when I get back Monday! Ack! School is looming! I am going to miss my babies so much!

One more thing, I have to celebrate my super mom-ish achievement today. I left the house with the twins by myself for the first time!  It's not that I was afraid to before-it was the logistics of parking lot parking and my wimpy arms not able to carry both car seats.  So now that we have baby bjorns, I went for it.  I put Tate in the bjorn and held Gracie and my diaper bag/keys in my arms.   I locked the door (with her head wobbling all over) and then walked to the car! That easy! Then I put her in her car seat, undid the bjorn and put him in his seat! Yay!  I immediately called my mom and dh to gloat. We met a friend and her little guy for lunch and then on the way home I got cocky. I drove through Starbucks to get myself a drink.  When I pulled into our parking lot I realized what an idiot I am.  How am I supposed to carry both babies AND my iced tall skinny vanilla latte? BAM! I am humbled. So I negotiate that baby A in bjorn can hold my cell phone and keys while I hold baby B and latte and the diaper bag (and leftover pizza from lunch) can stay in the car until Sean gets home. This worked out pretty well except for Baby B's screaming because my cold drink was held at the back of his neck while I carried and unlocked the door.  I thought there was a chance he'd appreciate it given our recent heat wave-no such luck.  No doubt the pizza in the car will really reek in a few hours as well.  Anyway, we made it home and as my husband would say I revolutionized the game.

Another weekend

I can't believe how fast time flies. It seems like each week just picks up speed.  I can't believe my babies are 3 months old now!!  This weekend was nice and low key.  Friday both grandmas watched the twins for an hour or so and we went grocery shopping and hit the BRU sale. Then home and bed. Saturday we hung around the house most of the day, but did an extended photo shoot for the 3 month old b-day!  We decided to try on the new swim wear we bought them for California.  Too cute for words.  Gracie in a bikini is hilarious and my Tater looked like such a big boy!  We rented a couple of movies and ran some errands. Sunday was church, went to my classroom to pack up some boxes (I am switching grades this fall) and went to our friends' house for some pre-season football and BBQ. They have a boy, Jackson, who is 3 weeks older and Gracie's boyfriend (their moms are convinced it's love). A fun time was had by all except Gracie who screamed for about 20 minutes of her nap.  I have NO idea what that was about.  Sometimes they cry mid-nap and we soothe a little, but usually wait it out and they will fall back asleep in 10 minutes or less.  This time she was screaming for so long, when I finally went to pick her up her little eyes were so red and swollen and she was doing these kind of sniffle breaths.  Oh broke.my.heart. I could have cried myself!  I think she was just over-tired from a wacky day and not getting good sleep.  We fed them and all were happy again. 

Last night we also bumped bed time again!  The last bottle was at 8:30 (instead of 9) and they were asleep by 9:00pm!  They slept great, they woke at 6:45  as usual, so I am stoked.  This will give us more time at night!  I think we will try it for another 2 weeks and then hopefully have them going down at 8pm before I start teaching in September.  This might be selfish, but we don't want to put them to bed before that because then we would hardly get any time with them after work!  Sean gets home at 5:30 as it is-that's not even 3 hours!  I am going to miss them like crazy. I know I couldn't be a stay at home mom (financially or emotionally), but this transition is going to be rough.  Sometimes I wonder if I am more protective because they were preemie and I can still see them hooked up to machines and barely eating anything.  Feels like if I'm not careful, they could be that fragile again.  I don't know, we have a fantastic sitter lined up so I know from church, so I will get through this. 21 days and counting. I will end with a few pics from our swimsuit debut!

This morning's photo shoot

We are sending some pics to Sean's grandparents in CA to get them excited for our visit in a week. I thought this would be a fun idea-the twins did not disappoint. :)